As I lay there in the road with bits of my body spread all around me, I offered up a silent prayer for death to take me and for the agonizing pain to stop.
I couldn’t believe it when I heard a reply;
”Welcome to Heaven”
Blissfully, I said, ”I’m ready to be taken now. I’ve always been a firm belie, ”
”All of our angels are busy helping other customers at the moment. Your death is important to us and is being held in a que. Please wait patiently”
‘And yea verily”, God declared, as was his usual manner of speech. ”Unto the shops, the males may descend, as it be the eve of Christmas, to venture forth and purchase vast array of unwanted gifts for their Female spouse.”
And descend they did, with the dole burning a hole in their pockets, and this being one of two days where they must spend around 22.99 of it on low end goods, and not Booze and Ciggies.
The other of course being Valentines Day.