There was a sign outside my hotel in Warsaw:
”English, French, Spanish, German, Russian and Italian spoken here.”
I tried to make myself understood in several of those languages, without success. In the end, using broken Polish, I asked one of the waiters to tell me who actually spoke all the languages on the sign.
”Only the guests,” he said.
I went to the travel agent today and the agent said, ”Did you know, two out of three people take an holiday in England.”
I replied, ”Great, I’d like to book a caravan in Cornwall for the wife and her mother, and I’ll have the all inclusive to Barbados please.”